Something Newly Sober Say That Comes Across As Judgmental
One thing that bothers me is when people post they quit drinking, but “not because I had a drinking problem.”
The benefits to sobriety are endless: improved sleep, decreased cancer risk, improved quality of life, more money in the bank. I can understand how anyone would desire to stop drinking whether they were drinking one drink a week or dozens.
But when you add your reasons for sobriety specifically do not include a drinking problem, you slide a wedge between yourself and anyone who might in fact struggle with a problem. You “other” those of us who did or do see drinking as a problem. It would be like me saying I go to the gym “but not because I have a weight problem.” So because someone else goes to the gym because of a weight problem they are somehow less? Other? Something to be ashamed of?
I think my favorite reason for sobriety is for the person who says they don’t know if they had a drinking problem. I think that’s about as honest of an answer as it gets.
But if you are in that very small percentage of people who got sober simply because you wanted to or had no desire to continue? Just say that. Don’t ‘other’ the rest of us who did in fact struggle with a drinking problem.
It hurts. It isolates. And it low key shames. And sobriety should be about celebration, not categorization. Someone’s reason for getting sober does not classify them as better than or less than anyone else.